"I'd rather shoot people than go to church"

We discuss all kinds of things at my house:war, humanity’s inhumanity to man (and to woman), ethics, poverty, and all sorts of social issues. Because I have PTSD, and because I believe that random bad stuff just happens sometimes, and that people (read common and leaders) do too little to reduce those bad things, I suppose I have been quite an influence on my two boys.

I am beginning to appreciate that more as the older one (16 going on 17) grows up and speaks out. I hope that my jaded attitude hasn’t harmed him.

When he was little, and I was experimenting with my attitudes toward religion (I am a recovering Catholic), I attended the Church of the Brethren for a few years. The Church of the Brethren seemed to fit my lifestyle of simplicity, nonviolence, and the desire to minimize destruction of the earth’s resources. Being one of the Brethren was almost like being Amish, without the requirement of having lots of babies, which was one of the problems I had with Catholicism as well.

This predated our nation's current involvement with Iraq and Afghanistan. My older boy was still quite young, and I dragged him to church with me. I convinced the pastor that he was of the "age of reason," and he and I were baptized into the Brethren faith. This provides my son with conscientious objector status if the draft is reinstated, which was also a factor in my choice.

Well, we drifted away from that church. Its members tended not to be as tolerant as I am. There was a little scandal at a neighboring church about a cross-dressing couple. Some people got pretty excited about that. Maybe they weren’t cross-dressing in dark enough clothes, I don’t know.

Anyway, my feeling has always been, gee, I don’t care who people sleep with or what they wear. Just don’t proposition me, my kids, or my horse, okay? Also, with the PTSD, I guess I don’t play or pray well with others.

We stopped going to church. Somewhere along the line my older boy has decided that religion is the root of all evil. I kind of get his point. He watches the news. Christians, Muslims, fighting, stupidity. Righteous people thinking poor people must be inherently bad and lazy or they wouldn’t be poor. It goes on. Plus, he has watched me struggle to provide for him and his brother, and fight for benefits from the Veterans Administration (one nation under God).

A few weeks ago I mentioned the Brethren connection to him. I told him that if a draft is reinstated he should find God again right away, and start attending services. He demurred.

Last night on the way home from the grocery store he told me, “I’d rather kill people than go to church.” Extreme?

Okay, I think he was trying to make me laugh, and it worked. Then again, it might be true. What does that say about the impact of religion on our children? Not as a cause of unity and peace, but an excuse for intolerance and violence against those who are different.

What would Jesus think?